Dating a Guy: Decoding the “I Don’t Know What I Want” Dilemma

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where the guy you’re seeing says, “I don’t know what I want”? It can be frustrating and confusing, leaving you unsure of where you stand. But don’t worry, I’ve been there before, and I can help shed some light on what he might be thinking.

What Could He Be Truly Feeling?

Before we dive in, it’s important to remember that there might not be a straightforward answer. When someone says, “I don’t know what I want,” it can mean different things. Here are a few possibilities:

1) He is scared of his feelings

Love is a powerful emotion, and for some men, it can be overwhelming. If he’s starting to develop strong feelings for you, it might leave him uncertain and confused. Processing emotions isn’t always easy for men. Give him space to process his feelings and be patient.

2) He’s not into you

This might be a tough pill to swallow, but it’s a possibility. He could be telling you he doesn’t know what he wants to let you down gently. Consider if you want to be with someone who isn’t upfront and honest about their feelings.

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3) He’s terrible at expressing his emotions

Many men struggle with opening up and expressing their emotions. This could be the case for him too. It might take time for him to communicate what he truly wants. Be patient and create a safe space for him to share.

4) He actually doesn’t know what he wants

Believe it or not, he might genuinely be telling the truth. Committing to a relationship is a significant decision, and he may be unsure about taking that step. Give him time to figure things out and focus on building a connection.

What Should You Do About It?

Now that we’ve explored some possible reasons for his confusion, let’s discuss what you can do about it.

1) Trust your gut

Take a moment to reflect on your own feelings. What do you truly want? Write down your thoughts and gain a clearer understanding of your own desires.

2) Trigger his hero instinct

Men have a biological drive to be heroes in their relationships. Allow him to step up and be your everyday hero. Show him that being in a relationship with you doesn’t compromise his freedom.

3) Give him space

If you believe he genuinely likes you but needs time to process his emotions, give him the necessary space. Pushing him to make a decision will only lead to frustration. Trust that he will come around when he’s ready.

4) Communication is key

If you’ve tried everything and his confusion persists, it might be time for a frank conversation. Let him know your desires and that you won’t wait around indefinitely. Sometimes, a clear ultimatum can bring about a necessary resolution.

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How to Get Him to Commit

If you’re convinced that your feelings for him are worth pursuing, consider triggering his hero instinct. Allow him to feel like he’s earned your respect, and he will realize what he truly wants. To learn more about this concept, watch this insightful video by relationship psychologist James Bauer.

Remember, understanding someone’s feelings and desires can take time. Be patient, trust your instincts, and focus on your own happiness. Ultimately, you deserve to be with someone who knows what they want and is willing to commit to you wholeheartedly.

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