When You Want Exclusivity: Navigating the Relationship

You’ve met someone special, and you’re ready to take your relationship to the next level. But what if he hasn’t brought up the topic of exclusivity? As a smart, single woman over 40, you might be wondering what your next move should be. Should you wait patiently? Or is it time to walk away? There are definitely steps you can take to move the relationship forward. Let’s delve into some advice for navigating this situation.

The Connection is Real

You’ve met a man who checks all the boxes – kind, considerate, and funny. The chemistry is undeniable, and you enjoy each other’s company. The only hiccup? He is a shift worker, and his availability as a cop dictates your meetups. But that shouldn’t discourage you.

Express Your Interest

After six fabulous dates, it’s clear that he initiates contact just as often as you do. His sincerity and fondness for you are undeniable. However, before you met, he expressed hesitation about rushing into relationships. So, rather than discussing your “status,” exercise patience and allow the connection to develop naturally.

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

While it’s crucial to give him space, you can still signal your readiness for exclusivity. Here are some ways to do so:

  • When he asks you out, express your happiness and excitement to be together.
  • Let him take the lead in making plans and moves, but don’t hesitate to contribute your ideas and suggestions occasionally.
  • Make it clear how happy he makes you. Don’t assume he already knows.
  • Share your growing feelings for him and your desire to get to know him on a deeper level.
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Remember, open communication is key. Don’t play games or try to be hard-to-get. If both of you are scared to express your feelings, the relationship may not progress. Someone needs to take the leap and be open about their emotions. And it’s perfectly fine if it’s you. Resist the urge to ask the “where are we going” question; let him be the one to make that move.

Embrace Vulnerability

Putting yourself out there may feel risky, but it’s worth it. By being open and vulnerable, you create a safe space for him to do the same. This opens the door for deeper conversations about your feelings, relationship goals, and shared future aspirations. Starting these conversations is a huge step forward, regardless of the final outcome.

It’s important to remember that deciding to date exclusively doesn’t mean you’re signing up for marriage. It simply means that you want to focus exclusively on each other, exploring the potential for a beautiful relationship.

Keep an Open Mind

Lastly, kudos to you for continuing to date other men, even if your heart is set on this particular person. Dating others helps alleviate impatience, sharpen your dating skills, and remind you that there are plenty of great single men out there.

With love and support,
Bobbi

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